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Guest post by: Anne Bachrach Become an Author

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Whether you are a group leader, or a storeowner, or even an ordinary man walking down the street, one thing is for certain: people don't trust you. Why should they? They don't even know who you are. Life experience (not to mention ghastly news coverage) has warned them not to be naïve about life or about strangers that they meet.

How to Build Trust

How can you build trust, even with people who have already assigned you a negative role? The best advice is, in a few words, to be straightforward. Be honest, which should be prerequisite to any business, and be upfront about what you want and what you're prepared to give. If people catch you in a lie then they will probably never fully trust you again. If people sense that you are too shy or desperate to come out and say what you mean, then that awkward energy could give them reason to doubt your intentions. Now just because you want something doesn't mean that you should shamelessly go about asking for it. If you want to sell a used car, you don't have to admit that your entire inventory is garbage and that you just want to feed your family. Try telling the truth to your clients, but in a positive and respectful way. Admit that while some cars don't look so pretty, you did personally drive every one of them and they all worked fine. There's no reason to lie here, nor is there a reason to scare off a client with too much unwelcome honesty.

You might consider the act of being honest like a hard slap on a friend's back or maybe a firm handshake. Honesty is a great way to start a new relationship - all relationships. However, it's not always called for. Though you may be ultimately motivated by money, you are actually following goals that you set according to the primary directive. The directive you ask, to please the client and to offer high quality services. It's certainly not a lie, and in saying that, you are earning people's trust.

The best method I have ever seen for building a high-trust client relationship is the Values-Based Financial Planning^TM approach. However, if you aren't a trustworthy person, this method probably won't work for you.

How to Destroy Trust

Trust is typically earned over time, so the more consistent you are in your behavior the more friends you will make and the more people will want to do business with you. That is, unless you make some flagrantly stupid mistakes. Here are a few bad but unfortunately common errors that people make, which immediately destroy established trust.

Withholding Information: When you withhold useful information and always wait for the "opportune" time to use it, you are probably coming off as very scheming and thus untrustworthy.

Being a Braggart: If a person is so ego-driven that he can't even share credit with those who help him, then he will never earn anyone's trust.

Being Too Vague: If you are not clear about what you expect, or assume that everyone perfectly understands, then you either be mistrusted because of your shadiness or your incompetence.

Gossiping About Others: If you must, talk to a therapist. Avoid confiding in friends close to the situation or work acquaintances. Gossip travels quickly and always gets people into trouble.

Consider your current process for building trust with clients and prospects. How can you be even more effective at building trust and in a shorter amount of time so you can achieve your goals for the reasons that are important to you? It's good to review the way we currently do things and enhance them to be even more effective. Tweak your processes for even better results. Enjoy your relationships even more so you can enjoy your life even more.

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