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Guest post by: Barbara E. Friesner Become an Author

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Finding the perfect gift is challenging under any circumstances but buying for an aging loved one can be particularly difficult. Obviously you want to get them something they want but it really no longer makes sense for you to get them yet another doll for their doll collection or yet another tie because, hopefully at this point, they're getting rid of stuff. So what do you do?

Think in terms of what they really want but that they may not know they want.

FOR EXAMPLE:

Put old family movies onto DVDs for them - and give a copy to everyone else in the family, too. Just keep in mind that this process doesn't happen over night so start NOW.

If music is more to their liking, a CD of "old time" music - either from a play list purchased through iTunes or from their own record collection if you have them (& before you get rid of them) - is just the thing! Google "Favorite Melodies". They can make CD's or put them right onto an iPod (which you can also get from them). Just remember, as with converting your old movies, it's not something that happens over night.

And, if you give them CDs or DVDs, perhaps someone else in the family can buy them the iPod, CD or DVD player.

"Professional" Gift Certificates

Professional gift certificates (such as from a clothing store) is always an option. But if they have enough clothes, how about gift certificates for their local movie theatre, to have their hair or nails done at a local salon, for a car service (especially if they've just given up driving) or the services of a professional organizer.

Home Made Gift Certificates

Often your aging loved one needs help but won't admit it or accept it when offered. A home made gift certificate is great way to provide help without them having to admit they need it or ask for it. For example, mowing the lawn (by you, a neighbor kid or a professional service); spring and/or fall house preparation; cleaning out the garage or attic; once-a-week housecleaning . . . or anything that needs doing!

While you're at it, don't neglect the relationship. For example, a gift certificate good for lunch or afternoon tea with you. Or perhaps a night out together.

When you give a "home-made" gift cert - make it into a really big deal. Box, bows, etc - everything you'd do with a store-bought gift. And because it's a gift, they can't really turn it down!

Shopping On Line is a great option - especially if your loved one lives at a distance. It can be something practical such as weekly or monthly food orders, some frozen steaks, entrees, or fully cooked meals. Or how about something more fun - and a gift that gives all year long - such as a gift-of-the-month club. (It can also come every 3, 6, or 12 months or seasonal). For example, through a company called Flying Noodle (as seen on the Today Show) you can sign up for Desserts, Chocolate, Cigars, Beer, Coffee, Pizza, Fruit, Pasta, Cake, Wine, even Hot Sauce and Salsa, Flowers and plants- and lots more!

For the readers, consider magazine subscriptions - most of which also come in large print.

Give To Their Favorite Charity

Another great idea is making a donation in their name to a charity that means something to them. Last year my sister "adopted" a pygmy elephant for me through the World Wildlife Fund .I received a card with an adoption certificate and his picture. (Some also come with a little stuffed animal.) Since I love elephants, it was a great gift that meant a lot to me and didn't add to my "stuff" either!

If you're looking for just the right charity, Charity Navigator is a great site. In one location you can check out thousands of charities including their history and financial health. You can donate there or click the link to the website of the charity of your choice.

Or you might want to make it even more local and personal and give in their name to their local house of worship, library, school, etc.

If There Are Special Needs, here are three suggestions for websites for products that are useful for a whole range of disabilities.

For products for all other disabilities, check out first STREET for Boomers & Beyond.

For a comforting therapeutic gift for a senior parent, grandparent, aunt, friend or anyone who benefits from active warm hands, check out Twiddle Muff! I got one for my mother and it's adorable!

And if they have Dementia, why not have the whole family make or contribute to memory books or check out Ageless Design at for a wide range of dementia products.

And last but by no means least, home-made options are always a welcome gift.

Have your young kids make something like a picture or a handprint in ceramic for them. If they draw a picture, consider framing it - or give them picture frames for pictures they already have. Or homemade candy, cake or cookies, or something you knitted, sewed, embroidered, or otherwise home made.

Barbara Friesner

AgeWiseLiving LLC

Eldercare Issues Resolved By Choice, Not Crisis

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