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Barbara E. Friesner Articles

Written by: Barbara E. Friesner

Finding A New Job While Caregiving - Click To Read Article
They say finding a new job is a full time job. Needless to say then that looking for a new job while working is exhausting. Well, what do you do when you already have TWO jobs-your day job and your job as caregiver to an elderly relative-and you'd love to be doing something different? It's no wonder that so many people in this situation feel trapped not only from a time perspective but because their current life situation has added emotional and financial responsibilities that they must take into account.

Talking With Your Aging Parents About Planning For the Future - Click To Read Article
Have you tried to get your elderly parent(s) to discuss their legal documents only to get the response "Don't worry, I'm leaving everything to you." - or you can't get them to talk at all? If so, you're not alone!

When Your Parents Move in with You - Click To Read Article
Your Mom and/or Dad has moved in with you. At some point s/he told you s/he wants to pay you something to help defray the cost and you said no. Or maybe when the subject came up and you were uncomfortable and said “let's discuss it later”.

Elder Caregiving: How to Help Family Members with Denial - Click To Read Article
Family members get so frustrated that their aging parents or their siblings are in denial. "How can they not see it?" Some people think those in denial don't see the situation clearly because they don't want to. I don't think that's it.

What Exactly Is A Generational Coach? - Click To Read Article
It’s easy to give you “technical” stuff about Generational Coaching . . . ~ That I help family members know what to do and how to do it so that their elderly parents will willingly do what’s in their best interest; ~ That I work only with the family members, never the senior; ~ That all Generational Coaching is by phone; ~ And that I work with one person – or several people – by conference call so they will work together to confront the issues – not each other.

Caring for Aging Parents: How Do I Know the Right Thing to Do? - Click To Read Article
I get asked this question a lot from my Generational Coaching clients: When making decisions for my aging parent, how do I know what is the right thing to do? The first question you will always ask is “What is in the best interest of my aging loved one”?

Helping Your Aging Parents Help Themselves (Step Two) - Click To Read Article
"THE 2-STEP PROCESS TO AGREEMENT" consists of 1) helping your Vicky-D's (your aging parents) determine what they want and 2) helping them get it. A process by which, rather than you trying to convince them to do what's in their best interest, you help them convince themselves to want to do what's in their best interest - ideally the same thing!

Helping Your Aging Parents Help Themselves (Step One) - Click To Read Article
"THE 2-STEP PROCESS TO AGREEMENT" consists of 1) helping your aging parent(s) determine what they want and 2) helping them get it.

Keeping in Touch: How to Avoid Return to Sender - Click To Read Article
I've always been a big postcard sender and this vacation was no exception! Watching me write the cards, one of the friends with whom I was traveling, a woman in her 80's, mentioned how sad it is that she's lost contact with many of her friends over the past several years. She said she doesn't know if her friends are sick, have passed away, or moved, and she doesn't know how to find out.

Caring for Aging Parents: What's The Best That Could Happen? - Click To Read Article
How often have you done something that you really dreaded and heard yourself saying "that wasn't so bad"?

Recognizing the Clues to Your Aging Parents' Situation - Click To Read Article
Singing Christmas carols, lighting Hanukkah candles, roasting chestnuts by a roaring fire - things most of us will be doing in the next few weeks. This is also the time of year when we see parents and other aging loved ones that we may not have the opportunity to see the rest of the year.

Elder Caregiving: Oy, The Guilt Already! - Click To Read Article
Are you giving everything you've got and then some to be a caregiver for an aging loved one and still feeling guilty that you're not doing more? If so, welcome to the club!! Not a club you want to be a member of? Then here are some suggestions that will help you out.

Become an Organized Caregiver: Master the Art of Herding Cats - Click To Read Article
Recently I received a call from a woman who attended my Balancing Work & Eldercare Needs seminar about a year ago asking if I would email or fax to her the information on "Mastering the Master Schedule". Apparently, with 2 kids entering middle school, she was feeling overwhelmed - much the same way she did when taking care of her father - like she was herding cats! She said she remembered how much the master schedule had helped her and her sister organize their father's care and thought it would be perfect to get her children's schedule under control, too!!

Another Eldercare Issue: Hoarding - Click To Read Article
What is hoarding? What are the differences between clutter and hoarding? What are some reasons people hoard? These questions and more will be addressed in this article.

Trash or Treasure: De-cluttering That Preserves The Memories - Click To Read Article
Do you have a "memory box" filled with treasures such as a corsage from your high school prom, your Girl Scout badge sash, old Valentine's cards, a napkin from your wedding, ticket stubs from your first pro ball game, or your baby's first shoes? While this "stuff" may look like junk to others, to you these mementos represent precious memories, the story of your life - what I call the "family fortune".

Taking Control of Eldercare Paperwork - Click To Read Article
As an eldercaregiver, do you feel like you're playing "Whack-a-Mole" at a carnival but without the cool prize? Every time you get one issue under control such as managing your elderly parent's finances, maintaining their home, dealing with their driving (or driving them), another one pops up? If so, you're not alone.

Should You Sign A Nursing Home Admission Agreement? - Click To Read Article
Admitting a loved one to a nursing home can be very stressful. In addition to dealing with a sick family member and managing all the details involved with the move, you must decide whether to sign all the papers the nursing home is giving you. Nursing home admission agreements can be complicated and confusing, so what do you do?

Great Gifts for Your Aging Loved Ones - Click To Read Article
Finding the perfect gift is challenging under any circumstances but buying for an aging loved one can be particularly difficult. Obviously you want to get them something they want but it really no longer makes sense for you to get them yet another doll for their doll collection or yet another tie because, hopefully at this point, they're getting rid of stuff.

Communication that Works with Aging Parent or Older Clients - Click To Read Article
Do you want to open the lines of communication with your parents? Do you sell products or services to seniors and want the most effective communication possible?

Basic Eldercare Realities - Click To Read Article
I always say that for the best results, talk early and often with your aging loved so you can resolve your eldercare issues by choice, not crisis. The earlier you start talking, the easier it is to get plans in place. The better the planning, the easier it will be for them and you in the long term.





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