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If You Want To Be Happy and Successful Don't Become A Lawyer

Guest post by: Dr. Paul Lanthois

Article Overview: No wonder lawyers have the highest incidence of depression among professions and are the most inclined to resort to drugs and alcohol to manage stress. According to this survey, the majority of lawyers have a warped view as to what makes you successful...

If You Want To Be Happy and Successful Don't Become A Lawyer

I had always heard stories about lawyers being callous, money hungry low-lifes but my experience of them hadn't backed that up. That wasn't until I met this one lawyer during a mediation session.

A friend of mine asked me if I could come along as his support person as he and his ex - wife were finalizing their divorce arrangements during a mediation session. Knowing both parties and their children I went along to ensure that he was going to be fair and reasonable during this mediation. Unfortunately his ex-wife hired a lawyer for this mediation and this lawyer was a real piece of work.

It became readily apparent that this lawyer was not interested in mediation and was only interested in playing games of antagonism, threats and bluff. It was clearly the lawyer's intention to draw out the proceedings as long as possible when during the final minutes when negotiations were meant to be finalized; the lawyer suggested another round of mediation with lawyers representing both sides. That happened nearly a year ago, and the divorce proceedings are still to be finalized with the ex-wife no longer having the funds to continue legal representation.

The lawyer had squeezed as much money out of the case as possible and then left the scene. This may be a harsh call to generalize lawyers as money hungry butthe Australian Financial Review reported a Beaton Consulting survey of 1164 partners and staff at 34 small to large law firms adds weight to the claim. It suggests that what most lawyers think is important to be successful is way off the mark. In the survey they ask about what was most important to them in a job.

31% said that money was the most important

34.5% said that they loved doing law and doing great work and working with leaders was most important

These two groups were two times more likely to be working in one of the top ten law firms.

Typically smaller law firms had lawyers who valued a work life balance and more flexible work arrangements. The majority of these lawyers were females between the age of 55 -59.

It seems that the young and upcoming lawyers are going to be in for a rude awakening if they think that the thrill of the money of the job is going to make them happy and successful in the long term.

The study of adult development followed 268 Harvard students for the next 70 years and assessed what had the greatest influence on the happiness and success of their careers.They assessed an effective and rewarding life through 10 events:

1) High income

2) High occupational prestige

3) Being alive at 80 and feeling good physically

4) Being alive at 80 and actually being physically healthy (as opposed to just feeling good)

5) Being alive at 80 and feeling good mentally

6) Being alive at 80 and being mentally healthy

7) Being in a happy marriage between the age 40-70

8) Having a good parent-child relationship

9) Having good social supports and relationships at age 70

10) Early cessation of smoking

It seems that the majority of the work focused or money focused lawyers have missed the point on what is going to make them successful and happy. The research clearly found that by far, that the most influential factor in a happy and successful career was the maintaining of close personal and family relationships.

It is no wonder that the incidence of depression among lawyers is spiking amidst the financial downturn. According to a 2007 Beaton Consulting survey, lawyers hadthe highest incidence of depression out of all surveyed professions and were the most likely to use alcohol and other drugs to manage their sadness and depression. If you are focused just on the work or the money, the time to develop and maintain relationships outside of work isn't a priority. Your ability to develop and maintain close relationships will likely wane and the research indicates that when the personal life goes down the toilet, your professional life and overall quality of life may follow.

Money can often come and go in accordance with economic cycles yet relationships often strengthen in times of crisis. To become a truly sustainable profession, the lawyers may need to reassess what's truly important. I have nothing against people makingabundant sums of money. In fact, I encourage it. It is the pursuit ofthe almighty dollar at the exclusion of their relationships that upsets the scales of work life balance.

Time developing and maintaining personal and family relationships can cost you money and opportunitiesin the short term. This70 year study suggests that any potential loss of income should be regarded as the ultimate savings plan because the benefits pay off in terms of happiness and fulfillment in life.The investment also seems to grow regardless of economic conditions.

Oh, the price of happiness.

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Article Tags: antagonism, divorce proceedings, intention, job, law firms, lawyer, lawyers, legal representation, mediation session, much money, negotiations, playing games, support person, work life balance



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