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Control Your Mind and Forget The How

Guest post by: Jackie Mckay

Article Overview: Perhaps you've been dreaming of quitting or changing your job, moving to a new city, playing in a band professionally or starting up your own business. Or perhaps the dream is writing a bestselling book and going on tour. You love the idea of it, you imagine yourself on Oprah. Sitting on her yellow leather sofa, talking to her and her live studio audience.

Control Your Mind and Forget The How

The last couple of months, I've been talking about aiming for a MUCH bigger vision in my business, in my life, and in my purpose. I've hired a Virtual Assistant, a bookkeeper, a house keeper, a website designer, a creative person for my marketing and have committed to a mastermind group of other women who are looking to play big and who have committed to keeping me on track, in calling me forth with my goals.

I've stretched, looked into the fears of dreaming big and looked at all the other emotions that come up once we've actually MADE the decision to play a bigger game. These are related to issues of security, self-deserving, upsetting the apple tree and self-doubt as to whether we really CAN play a bigger game in our life. Perhaps you've been dreaming of quitting or changing your job, moving to a new city, playing in a band professionally or starting up your own business. Or perhaps the dream is writing a bestselling book and going on tour. You love the idea of it, you imagine yourself on Oprah. Sitting on her yellow leather sofa, talking to her and her live studio audience. You may even be able to feel the warmth of the studio lamps and the nervous feeling you would have in the pit of your stomach. Perhaps you know what you'll be wearing and what she'll say to you. Your imagination is strong about what it would actually BE like once you're there. And it feels great.

No problem right? (Did you get nervous bubbles in your tummy?)

Actually, the Problem is, this is EXACTLY the point at which most people give up, probably even YOU. Right there. You see, most people get stuck doing do two things. They either wait for the HOW before they make a commitment to accomplish their big goal or they psyche themselves out and chalk their dreams up being too extreme or foolish. Perhaps you've found yourself saying:

"How will I ever get from here to THERE?"

"But I don't HAVE the resources (the funds, time, help) to make that big dream happen."

"I'm not qualified right now to take on this big dream. I just don't have what it takes yet."

"I'm too busy to even think about that as a reality."

"I can't afford THAT!"

And so the dream AND any other action stops there. UNTIL you find yourself bored again wanting "more" out of the daily to-do's. Perhaps you venture off again into dream land. But wait, more voices come up...

"I'm not in the perfect situation yet."

"Everyone and their MOTHER wants to be on Oprah. There's too much competition."

"Explain to me how it would ever happen and THEN I'll think about going for it."

"Is there a guarantee this will even work? Probably not worth trying if I don't have a plan"

If you've chatted with me recently I may have shared my lofty goals of my own bestselling workshops, teleseminars and famous products with you. Perhaps you've heard all about my dreamy quaint home on Kitsilano Beach in Vancouver. And here come my own voices... "You are CRAZY GIIIRRRL! Who do you think YOU are?"

But I've decided to" feel the fear and do it anyway", because here's what I'm noticing about "successful" people - I mean the people who seem authentically happy in their own skin and who are doing what they love. If you've got the commitment to do something, the intention is strong and you're willing to do anything it takes to get there, in a good way/not bad, then things WILL naturally unfold before you, like a flower that blooms in spring. You just need to take the first step, accomplish the task that's right in front of you, and then the next task will show up for you to work on. Once you've done that one, just the right opportunity will land on your lap, followed by the right resource to take full advantage of that opportunity or to accomplish the task at hand. And of course, you've got to STARE DOWN those dark insidious voices.

So this is what I see - we're taught to be planners and end up flakey when it comes to making courageous choices (or in my case, sometimes a bit of a control freak), we want to have the WHOLE thing planned out first, in every descriptive detail before we'll move towards those big desires.

Therefore, you have to stay connected to your inspired side, stomp out the voices and make a bold commitment. Your next step or the next opportunity will NOT show up until you've made the commitment and tackled the voices. But once you manage your internal insanity and commit, the next step shows up, and the more you do this, the faster things start showing up for you: the right job, the perfect price on an airline ticket, the spiritual guide with just the right message (even the fortune cookie with just the confirmation you've been asking for) or simply, just the right book to get you to that next level.

That's what is happening to me right NOW. It's fascinating to look back and see how the obvious steps unfolded to get to where I am now. Everything and every person has shown up as it was supposed to, and is so far rearranging the many details to make that big dream come true. In fact, it's pretty awe-inspiring. It's almost as though my intention and commitment to getting this big dream accomplished has taken a life of its own, in a really good way. And now, it's just about taking the next step that presents itself, without thinking of the next HOW. In fact, it's a very reassuring process, once you begin to see the pattern. My only job is detaining the inner critics.

Your Assignment:

Notice your internal conversation as it relates to your big dreams and goals for your life. Is there a way that you might be stopping yourself or putting a hold on your big dreams because you haven't yet figured out HOW it's going to happen? Is the planner, doubter or inner critic in you squashing the dreamer in you?

Instead, I'd recommend you gather your strength, deny your "smallness" and grab hold of the truth of yourself: that you CAN accomplish that big dream, that it's not a silly notion. Just the mere fact that you've thought of it means it can be done. Otherwise, you wouldn't have gotten the idea. Forgot the how! Stand up for your dreams! Just go for it. Take one step. Each "how" and the resource needed at that time will show up exactly when you need it.

And I'm here for you to make it happen, with all the support you need.

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Article Tags: job, oprah, starting up your own business



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