Surrogacy Versus Adoption: The Gift You Will Cherish Better

Photo by Pawel Loj, CC BY 2.0

If you are someone who has been trying to have a baby for such a long time, but it’s just not happening, then it’s likely that you’re looking into other options. This is a perfectly natural thing to do in the situation where you can’t have your own child. There are other perfectly legitimate ways to have the child of your dreams, rather than having the child yourself. Two of those options are surrogacy and adoption. Now, you’ve probably heard about both of these options, but you might not know the big differences between the two of them and what advantages/disadvantages each bring.

That’s exactly why you should keep reading down below to learn more about both surrogacy, adoption, and what makes them different. By the end of the article, you should be able to determine whether you would like to try out surrogacy or adoption to have the child of your dreams.


The first thing that you should think about when choosing between surrogacy and adoption is genetics. Do you want the child to be genetically related to you? If so, then surrogacy might be the way to go. When you have a surrogate mother carrying your child, she is not going to be related to your child. Embryos are inserted into the surrogate mother to ensure that the genetic material of both parents play a part in the baby’s development.

However, when you adopt a child, the birth mother and father are going to be the ones who are genetically related to the child. This can come with all kinds of legal and emotional troubles in the future and just the fact that your child does not carry your genes. That’s not a bad thing in many cases, but it’s definitely something to think about.

Screening & Care

When it comes to screening and pre-natal care, surrogacy is going to be a lot more complex and intrusive in this regard. When you have a surrogate carrying your baby, they are going to be required to give up things like alcohol and smoking as part of the agreement with the parents. Plus, they are going to have to go to regular medical screenings and receive pre-natal care in order to ensure the baby can grow up healthy and strong.

When you look at going through adoption services, these mothers did not necessarily have to go through all of this intensive screening and care. They simply had a baby, put him or her up for adoption, and that was that.


The thing you need to realize with surrogacy when it comes to the cost is that the surrogate mother has to be compensated for her time when she’s pregnant. When it comes to adoption, it’s illegal for mothers to get extra compensation beyond living expenses to pay for things like rent and groceries. There are also other fees that you have to think about when you are looking into both surrogacy and adoption. These would include medical fees, legal fees, and agency fees.

Another thing to think about is financing options. When you are going for surrogacy as your way to get your baby boy or girl, then there are not many financing programs available. This means that more money is going to have to come out of your pocket, which will include financial security of the woman, childbirth expenses etc.; whereas there are more financing options available for adoption.

Medical Process

When you think about the medical process of surrogacy and of adoption, they are completely different from each other. The medical process of adoption is pretty straightforward and there are no special procedures that need to be done. However, surrogacy is a completely different story. Surrogacy involves the surrogate going through various fertility treatments to ensure a high fertility rate and going through an egg retrieval procedure. These are things that don’t have to be done with the birth mother of an adopted child.

The Relationship

Of course, another big thing to keep in mind when you’re thinking about whether to go with surrogacy or adoption is the relationship you’ll have with the birth mother. When you adopt a child, the birth mother is giving up pretty much all relation to the child. There is no obligation for you to carry on a relationship with the birth mother or parents of an adopted child.

Even though there is no legal obligation for the surrogate of a child to stay a part of the child’s life, this is something that many couples decide is best. You are going to be developing a relationship with your surrogate over the months of the pregnancy and for many couples, it only makes sense to keep their surrogate in their lives. If you are OK with this, then surrogacy is definitely a great option for you.

Legal Process

When it comes to the legal process of surrogacy and adoption, they are very similar in this respect. You are definitely going to need a high-quality lawyer on your side to take you through all of the processes involved. Otherwise, you are going to have to deal with the legal battles between adoption / surrogacy agencies, birth mothers, and yourself.

The Matching

Most of the times, when it comes to adoption, the decision as to where the baby goes lies with the birth mother and father. They can make the decision about what kind of family their baby is going to. However, when it comes to surrogacy, the decision tends to be a bit more mutual than that between the two parties. A couple is able to look through the various surrogates that they have to choose from and see if the woman is interested in working with them. If that mutual interest is struck, then a match is made!

Each of these points are super important to think about when you are choosing between surrogacy and adoption to get the baby of your dreams. They are both great options for couples who have found it difficult to conceive a child for one reason or another.


A traveller by day and reader by night' is how I would sum up my life. My wanderlust led me to quit my cushy job at 28 and finally embark on a journey around the world. Since then, I have lived in many countries and soaked in as many books as possible during my travel journeys. Among them, the "Book of Mirdad" is still my personal favourite and holds a special place in my heart. My progression towards writing was inevitable and happened quite naturally. I have been writing for a few years now an...

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