What’s up, Believe Nation? My name is Evan Carmichael. My one word is believe, and I believe that entrepreneurs are going to solve all of the world’s major problems. I started the MentorMe series with the goal to try to learn from people who have done more than us, and by hanging around them a little bit longer, hopefully, some of their mindsets are added to their beliefs, their confidence, seep into us to help us become the best version ourselves.
Today, we’re going to learn from Lisa Nichols. and how to live a purpose-driven life. As always, guys, as you’re watching clips, if you hear something that really resonates with you, please leave it in quotes in the comments below. You might win a prize, but also, when you write it down, it’s much more likely to stick with yourself as well. Enjoy.
Lisa Nichols: Live a PURPOSE Driven LIFE
#1: Live Your Quest
When we talk about living our quest, I think that living my quest, really, if I look at it on a daily basis, it’s finding my own voice. It’s finding your voice. It’s finding the song that only you can sing, off key or not. It’s finding your rhythm. It’s discovering what it feels like to walk in your shoes today.
It won’t look like it looked 10 years ago. Living your quest is, what can I do with my life so that my life becomes infectious to someone else? Living my quest looks like, how do I make my fingerprint matter so big that it lives beyond my transition day? Living your quest is, how can I forgive the perceivingly unforgivable so I can love the absolute lovable?
Living your quest is, how do I give myself 1,000 second chances, and every time I get to 999, press reset? Yeah? Yeah. Living my quest is not some ambiguous, untouchable experience. Living my quest means going back and healing the little girl in me so that the woman can be free. It’s going back and embracing the little boy in you so that the man can show up and give himself permission to cry when necessary.
Living your quest is not something that you can’t touch. It’s not something that requires a stage, or lights, or cameras. Living your quest is being complete and content with who you are in the dark of the night so who you are in the middle of the day is all right. Living your quest is as simple as it is complex. Living your quest is about giving yourself permission, say, “permission.”
On a daily basis to become the next best version of yourself. Living your quest is not holding yourself hostage to old decisions, not holding yourself hostage to shame, blame, guilt, regret, and anger. Living your quest is about recognizing that every day, I can be reborn to my possibility. See, living your quest is as internal and personal as it is public. Living your quest is about recognizing that you have brilliance in you, and not being willing to dim your light one more day.
Living your quest means not being afraid of the genius in you, even though you have doubt. Living your quest is recognizing that you get to sing your song off tune, that you get to live in perfection while you master imperfection.
#2: Find True Balance
Myth number two is that abundance is singularly focused on possessions and money. Right? It’s all about what you drive, what you live in, how much money you make, when in fact, this couldn’t be further from the truth. Wealth is possessions and money. Abundance is a 360 experience. Write it down. Abundance is a 360 experience. True abundance, true abundance is your health, ’cause if you don’t have great health, life does not feel good.
Abundance is relationship. At the end of your life, literally, you will measure the quality of your life by the quality of the relationships you had. All the other stuff will fall away. That promotion you’re thinking about, you’re wondering about that raise, it will fall away in the area of importance when you get to the end of your life. You will begin to look at the quality of your relationships, how your children related to you, how your siblings related to you, do you have love in your life.
You literally will start looking at relationships at a higher level as you get older. When you mind them now, you take care of them, and I know that for a fact. I have a friend who’s worth $14 billion, billion with a B.
He was just partying at my house all night long. Lee, four in the morning, go home. He flew in from Canada to go to my New Years party because he loves my family connection, and he doesn’t have one. He is financially wealthy. He’s relationship broke. Does that make sense? Abundance is a 360 experience. It’s about relationships, it’s about health, it’s about your spiritual groundedness.
That doesn’t mean you have a religious origin. It’s about, can you release? Can you forgive? Can you let go? Can you be still? Do you meditate, do you have time with yourself? That has a lot to do with the quality of your life, that ability.
Visualization is a gift to your heart and your soul. It’s a gift because, if the idea is the seed, visualization is the fertilizer. It’s the fertilizer, because, when your thoughts are connected with an emotion, see, you would visualize yourself winning, and you would feel all the emotion that came with that, and all you’re doing now is, you’re not chasing a foreign emotion.
You know the feeling, and now, you’re just doing what’s necessary to get back to that feeling in real time. What a good friend of mine, Vishen, the CEO of Mindvalley, who you know, I did a visualization with him, we were in Bali, and he said to me afterwards, “I never get emotional. “I cried.”
Interviewer: He doesn’t. He doesn’t get emotional. He’s, like, super, yeah.
He was like, “I cried, I got emotional.” He goes, “I figured it out. “A good visualization brings in emotion.” He was like, “That’s how you do it.” I love doing visualizations, and it’s real important, in the visualization, you can’t see it over there. You have to see it right here.
Interviewer: To feel it.
You got to feel it right here, like, it’s all I am. I am. I am in my dream home. I am in my dream relationship, and then unpack what that looks like, but most importantly, unpack what it feels like. When you have that emotion in this moment, all of a sudden, you stir up something that I don’t think will ever go back to sleep. It’ll go, “Okay, let’s go get that.”
What it really does is, it sets up a state of cognitive dissonance, and cognitive dissonance is when you see something in your mind, and you see yourself in a way that your behaviors are not currently leading to, so your mind becomes disrupted, and it goes, “Okay, can we get there?”
Interviewer: Right, ’cause I’m not there right now.
I’m not there right now, and that’s not comfortable. Your mind wants to literally be congruent, what it thinks is what you’re doing, what it thinks is what you’re doing. When you set up a constant, and abundant thinkers like you and I, we do it unconsciously, we are constantly keeping ourself in a state of cognitive dissonance, meaning, okay, what else?
I’m seeing Lisa over there, and I’m going, “Okay, let me go,” while being grateful for my now. It’s not in that I’m going to be whole and complete when I get over there. I’m whole and complete now. I just know I’m supposed to be over there, so let me do what’s necessary to get over there, and let me evict any behaviors or characteristics that are stopping me, and let me adopt any new ones that I need.
#4: Create Micro Wins
You’re super achievers. I’m a super achiever. One thing we have to constantly remind ourself is to create micro wins to get to our macro wins, that we go after the macro win, but we only look at the macro win. I want you to look at the micro wins and get five micro wins under your belt so you can create your macro win. That way, you celebrate yourself a lot more often, yes, yes? That way, you can have an indicator that you’re on the right track more often. That way, your fuel is being acknowledged more often.
That way, you know you’re on the right track. Let’s get to micro wins, micro wins, micro wins can lead to a macro win. Can we agree with that? I’m showing you how abundant thinkers think. To me, you model successful people. When I was on the Oprah Winfrey show, on one of the commercial breaks, she said, “So Lisa, how many coaches do you have?” She didn’t ask me if I had a coach. She said, “How many coaches do you have?” I said, “Two.” On the next commercial break, what you think I did? I asked her, “How many coaches do you have?” She said, “Four.”
When I left the show, what do you think I did? Right? I hired two more coaches. Success leaves clues. I’m going to give you some of the clues. People who are living an abundant life now, you guys just allow this to be a salve of confirmation.
Then, for everyone else who’s moving in that direction and moreso in that direction, these are the things that abundant-thinking people do all day every day. One, we create micro wins so we can get to macro wins, and we celebrate the micro wins. Far more celebrations in life.
#5: Enhance Your Enrichment
You are only going to go as far as you think you’re worthy. I can push, you can push. You can have the greatest product, but if you don’t feel worthy, you will work hard to sabotage that relationship.
Interviewer: Every day, you will.
Right, you don’t know you’re doing it. You just think, “These are the things I need,” and you’re driving that guy away. You’re driving that woman away because your self-worth says they weren’t going to stay forever anyway, or self-worth around money. You have a cap that you feel like you’re worthy of a million dollars, you will always get to 999,000, and you will stop because your self-worth says it.
Interviewer: What’s a good exercise or process that we can follow on a daily basis, maybe something simple, to enhance our enrichment and worthiness?
Absolutely. I did this for six months every single day right after I brushed my teeth. It’s the I See You exercise. You get in the mirror. Now, it’s not necessarily simple ’cause you dealing with yourself, and as complicated as you are will be the degree.
Interviewer: The mechanics of it are simple.
Right, the mechanics are very simple, yes. I appreciate that distinction. You get in the mirror, you complete three different sentences. You want to write this down. The first sentence, you look at yourself, and you say your name, so you would say, “Louis,” and you complete the sentence, “I’m proud that you,” and find seven different things every day to celebrate yourself four, seven different.
Each day, you can do the same thing you did the day before, but each day, do seven different things to be proud of. The second sentence is going to knock you down a little bit. It’s going to come from your gut. “Louis, I forgive you for,” and cut the shackles to blame, shame, guilt, regret, and anger.
In that sentence, you cut those five shackles, not the first day, maybe not the third day, but by the 21st day, by the 13th day, you’ll feel some relief. “Louis, I forgive you for,” and go back five years, 15 years, 20 years, do that “I forgive you” for that thing don’t nobody know about but you, go ahead and cut those shackles ’cause if you can still think about it, it’s still in your energy space. The third sentence is, “Louis, I commit to you that.”
Before you make a commitment to anybody else throughout your day, you make seven commitments to you. The first sentence is, “I’m proud that you,” you’re celebrating yourself first. We are undercelebrated as a society. We look for acknowledgement.
They interviewed 100 executives that all made over a quarter of a million dollars and said, “Would you like a five percent raise next year, “or would you rather be told thank you more often?” 100%, 100% said, “Keep your money. “I’d rather hear thank you.” We’re undercelebrated, but first, celebrate you. Be the example.
When I was on Oprah, and she said, “What do you do?” I said, “I recognize that I’m the example “of how the rest of the world is supposed to treat me, “and it’s my job to give the world “the best example of how I like to be treated.” Celebrate yourself, forgive yourself, cut the shackles, and then commit to yourself before you commit to anyone else. That right there.
That right there will begin to fill your cup up to get to your salsa.
#6: Leap Afraid
When you talk about making your dash dance, point one, you got to be willing to do it afraid. See, you might be waiting for the fear to stop. “Lisa,” I heard this so many times, “Lisa, I’m afraid, what do I do?” Do it anyway. “Lisa, I’m afraid. “I don’t quite know if I should move.” Move anyway. “I don’t know if I should leap.” Leap afraid, and then gather your courage on the way down. If you don’t get it before you hit, you was going to hit anyway. I’d rather die leaping than on the edge figuring out how to get the courage to leap, yes, yes? Yes, yes?
Audience: Yes, yes.
So many times, we’re waiting. We’re waiting, I’m waiting. I’m waiting to get something right. I see your hands going up. You guys know, if it’s your truth, you can raise your hand just like we did on day zero. You just kind of waiting.
You waiting to get everything in order. You’re waiting, you’re waiting so that everything is in you, it’s together. You’re waiting to not be afraid. You’re waiting to have the courage. You’re waiting to have all the money. You’re waiting to lose weight. See, if I waited to release my unwanted pounds before I got in front of you, Lisa Nichols would be the secret. Yes, yes?
Audience: Yes, yes.
I thought, “How about I just leap with my imperfection, “and then find my form of perfecting my imperfection “while I’m soaring? “How about I do that?” How about you not wait to get it right? You figure out, how does it look doing it wrong? How does that look? Your 80% of right is somebody else’s 159% of what they needed. Yes, yes?
Audience: Yes, yes.
When you want to do it right, and you want to wait ’til you’re not afraid, and you want to wait ’til you have it all together, oh, you made it about you again. See, Nelson Mandela did it. He just did it not knowing if it were right. Mahatma Gandhi just did it not knowing if it were right. Mother Theresa just did it not looking for affirmation or confirmation, is this right?
Martin Luther King did it not even knowing if it would happen before his life ended. I mean, what are you waiting on? Are you willing to do it afraid? Are you willing to do it knowing that you got so much work to do to get it better, to get it more perfect, but are you willing to do it inside your imperfection? Do you realize that, in your imperfection, you’re perfect for the job?
Thank you guys so much for watching. I’d love to know, what did you think? What did you take from this video that you’re going to immediately apply somehow to your life or to your business? Let me know down in the comments below. I’m really curious to find out.
I also want to give a quick shoutout to Melissa Alexandria. Melissa, thank you so much for picking up a copy of my book, Your One Word, and doing that awesome review on your YouTube channel around it. I really appreciate the support, and I’m so glad that you enjoyed the reading.
In this video, I’m going to be going over the book Your One Word by Evan Carmichael. This is a book that I really, really enjoyed.
Thank you guys so much for watching. I believe in you. I hope you continue to believe in yourself, and whatever your one word is, much love. I’ll see you soon.
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